Monday, February 14, 2011

Well, it is official.  I am an oldie.  Really, an oldie.  I just watched the Grammies and half of the time I didn't know what they were singing about or who they were or if they were even singing at all.  The group that won the album of the year I never even heard of and their performance was all strobe lights and guys riding bikes and someone screaming into a bullhorn while a couple girls played violins and another beat a drum.  I couldn't get passed the strobes.  Now I know why they say they can cause epileptic fits.  I almost had one and I don't even have epilepsy.
The young women hardly had any clothes on.  Not in a pretty or scanty kind of way--the costumes looked like ugly bathing suits gone wild to me. Lady Gaga even had some weird prosthetics on her head and her shoulder.  She changed clothes at least once but when she got her award she was wearing something that looked like a Lego snap on suit.  It was heavy plastic molded over her body....even the butt cheeks.  To tell the truth, since I have no butt, I was a little jealous of that part.  The boobs had hooks on them?????????
Not that the folks representing my generation did much better.  Barbra Streisand sang like a timorous mouse and Kris Kristofferson looked downright feeble.
Bob Dylan performed and you could barely understand a word he said and he had a bunch of kids for back up which he needed....badly.  Mick Jagger pranced around the stage singing YO yo yo.  All I could think was that even though he has a lot of youthful energy if he took his clothes off he'd look like Mr. Burns on The Simpsons!
I loved Eminem.  I can't help myself.   He reminds me of my kids at school back in the day.  Even when he raps about terrible things, I can't help myself... I just love him.  Frankly, I never understand a word he raps but that's ok.  I'm sure he could care less.
I loved wearing his red leather gloves.  I want them.  Oh and now I am a fan of B.O.B.  Apparently I can't get enough of those names with periods.   I am now going by as you saw above. It's pronounced  Su- Ess- Ann.   If you run into me, feel free to use my new moniker.  It is the only thing new about me because as I stated earlier, I am an oldie.  And you'll recognize me by my disappearing butt.

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