Monday, August 30, 2010

Emmys 2010

I thought I watch a lot of television but last night's Emmys proved me wrong.  I kept saying to DH-"who's that?"  He didn't know either.  That, however, doesn't keep me from having my opinion on how they were dressed!  Half of them are skinny as broomsticks and look slightly ill if you ask me.  You can't starve yourself that much and still look good in person.   Maybe on camera you can pull it off but not in the glaring California sun.
Susan Sarandon and Glenn Close, if you want to have your picture taken at an awards show, don't stand by your daughter who looks ravishing and YOUNG!!  You have to keep up the allusion that you are young or you won't get any more jobs except as somebody's gramma.  You are both wonderful and talented so take my advice.
Speaking of Grammas, Betty White went classic in the everybody's gramma's dress that she wore to their wedding.
To the web sites that tell me that John Hamm's girlfirend is ( l.) and the only other person in the picture is him, I think I can figure that out for myself.  Oh, and John, don't give the thumbs up--not very "Don Draper" of you.
I think the most beautiful of all last night was Claire Danes.  She looked wonderful and was in a wonderful movie that explains some things about autism. Simply elegant are the words that come to mind.  The only person who came close was the little girl from Mad Men.
Lea Michele from Glee looked lovely too.
Mariska Hargity was channeling her mom--the very curvy Jayne Mansfield, don't you think?  Pretty Vavavavoom.
January Jones looked out of it and her dress fit her persona quite well?  What was she thinking?  Oh, wait , from the look of her last night(she went from staring vapidly into the ozone to a big crazy grin if someone spoke to her) she wasn't thinking at all.
But, by far, the weirdest look of the night went to that girl from The Office.  You'll see what I mean.  What can one even say about this get up??
Once again I had a most enjoyable time playing fashion police. Thanks, Emmys!

Thursday, August 26, 2010


Since I seem to be on a roll with frogs, I just found out that there is a frog that is the size of a pea.  No kidding!  Scientists just discovered its existence recently.  I don't know if it is poisonous or what good it does for the environment but how cute is that??  The size of a pea!
It seems like a cross between two fairy tales gone wild--the princess and the pea who turned into a frog!  I like it!  It may be a new classic.
Anyway, scientists discovered them because they made "harsh, rasping noises" at sundown.  The scientist  and I quote"made them" jump onto a white cloth to study them.  I just wondered how you make a frog do what you want.  I would have loved to be there.  Did they say," Jump,frog,jump"??   Or "Get onto the white cloth or else"? or "Pretty please with a fly on top"?  They probably really just prodded or poked them but I just got that mental picture and it made me laugh.
I saw a picture of one of the frogs by a penny but I didn't copy it to post here because it just looks like a little blob on the side of the penny.  I found a better pic but remember this little guy is only 10.6mm in size.
Now that that's done, maybe we can get on to the problem of global warming or animal extinction.

Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Move Over, Miss Piggy

I just love Kermit the(read that as thee)Frog.  I loved when he interviewed the fairy tale characters to find out the"news" as it was happening and everything would get completely mucked up.  I loved when he sang to us about it not easy being green.  I loved when he rode a bike in the Muppet Movie.  I loved it that he wanted to have a show on Broadway just like Mickey Rooney and Judy Garland. He even pulled off a credible Bob Cratchett.
Kermit was cute and cuddly and grew to be a famous...uh.....amphibian.  He is so famous now that his original self is on display at the Smithsonian in Washington, D.C.  Oh, you thought he was already there didn't you?  Well, that was a different incarnation of the famous frog.  This is the one that Jim Henson made from the coat his mom threw in the trash and has eyes made out of pingpong balls.  Apparently, he showed up on the very short and short-lived show, Sam and Friends, one of Henson's earliest creations.  He had to step it up when he joined the cast of Sesame Street so the original Kermit got dumped in the nearest closet until now.
He isn't the spring-like green we mostly remember but kind of a washed out olive green but his heart is still on his sleeve and his message rings true, It's not easy to be green but if you stick to it, you'll find your rainbow connection.

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Uniformly Speaking

My friend told me that she and her fellow teachers are being trained in a new program that treats every child the same and teaches them in the same manner.....because all kids are the same...............well, no they're not.
She also told me the state "scores" of the schools in her district and lo! and behold!  the school that was doing the best is a magnet school that chooses its students and the worse one is located in the poorest section of town. Hmmmmm.  Are we detecting a pattern here???
First, we tell kids they are unique and should be proud of what they are.  Then we teach them all in the same technique.  What if you were one of those kids who didn't get it right away?  Would you be proud of who you were?  Why are we setting up six and seven year olds to doubt their self-worth?  If you are six and can't write a paragraph, there is probably nothing wrong with you that a year or so's growth wouldn't fix.
Not every kid born on the same day, walks on the same day or says Mama on the same day as all the other kids born on that day.  How scary it would be if they did--we'd have little automatons!  But pack them off to school at five or six and they all better learn the sound of the letter M on the day the teacher presents it.  And at the end of the school year they all have to know exactly the same material.
And to top it all off, they have to prove it on one or two tests administered by nervous staff.  Why is the staff nervous?  Because they are being held accountable for the results.  No one takes into consideration that a child may feel ill, that there was a big blowup at home before they left for school or that maybe they didn't get breakfast and possibly no dinner the night before.  I read recently that just a 2% loss of body water can effect your ability to do simple tasks and think clearly.  How do we know if these kids are even hydrated?
And yet, the whole blame falls on the teachers if the kids don't do stellar work on these state mandated tests.
I knew a little boy who took a week's worth of kindergarten tests and did miserably.  So miserably that the first grade teacher thought she'd be lucky if she could even teach him the beginning skills of reading. 
That kid had started reading at age 4 and in kindergarten could read books intended for first and second graders.  I'm not saying this kid was a genius but he was bright and clever.  Bright enough to sense the urgency in his teacher's voice when she talked about the importance of doing well on the kindergarten tests.  He was so worried about his performance that he didn't sleep at all the first three nights of the test.  The fourth night he finally fell asleep around 1 am and that is the one test he did quite well on.   Did the teacher know this--why, no.  A five year old isn't going to complain about insomnia to the teacher he loves and adores.  Did the first grade teacher know it?  Why, no, because she had no way of knowing.  Mom told her....Mom told her the whole story and the teacher decided to move the kid to a different reading group and he took off and had a wonderful experience through the rest of grade school---except the week of the standardized test. 
Mom was able to teach him a few coping tricks but he never did sleep well before a big test forever after.
Now if a teacher who loves a kid doesn't know this, how in the world would the state government know it or the computer that graded the standardized test know it?
When it comes to the very young, kindergartners and first graders, I say, let those kids be kids.  Don't frighten or intimidate them with big tests whose results can even effect how much money the state gives their school.  Test how well they read in second grade or better yet, third grade.
Sure, give them a general knowledge test in seventh grade and test them junior year to make sure they are ready to go to college or into the workplace.  Those are appropriate tests and necessary tests.
State governments need to recognize that kids are all unique and learn in different ways and teachers are hard working, creative people who can teach to their needs.
We need a giant wake up call to help our kids to become the unique indiviuals they are.

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

New Kid in Town

Before I say anything else I want to tell you that I didn't look to see what this new and I quote"idiot proof" symbol means.   I mean it's idiot proof and I'm no idiot that's for sure.  Well, some may disagree with that but I digress.
I think it is the universal sign for "Wow!! You have a fat ass."
Now that I typed that I am going back to read the article and see if I'm right.  I'll be right back.
Well, I was wrong.  I am writing in a new font now so you know I really did leave and come back to this entry..  but still I am not an idiot as 46% of the drivers who saw this symbol couldn't figure it out either.  So there are either a lot of idiots or this symbol isn't what it is cracked up to be.
It is the international sign for low tire pressure.  Now you see it don't you??   No, well, me either. Anyway if you see this sign on your dashboard you are in deep doo-doo.  So beware. And don't flash the sign to anyone with a fat ass, just in case.

Thursday, August 12, 2010

It's Official

I am officially SICK AND TIRED of the meltdown guy. (Notice how I just had a mini meltdown of my own?)  That's because I can't stand looking at that guy's self satisfied smug expression for one more day.
And now, Entertainment Tonight wants to know who I think should play him in the movie  Matt Damon or Philip Seymour Hoffman?  You know who I think it should be?  NOBODY!  This guy does not deserve any movie deal or book deal or any kind of deal.
His boring and probably petty life would not make a good show and one meltdown does not a movie make.  I hear that the passengers were real jerks to him for 20 years but if that many people are jerks to you maybe you need to take a look at yourself--I'm just sayin'.
Drinking beer while sliding down the escape hatch seems like juvenile to me and ranting over the intercom was just plain stupid.
In this economic hard time, I'm pretty sure that someone would love that job with pretty good pay and benefits.  I bet there will be a line around the block if his job opens up.  Oh, who am I kidding, when his job opens up.
So now he's been famous for fifteen minutes....or one hundred and fifty hours or  fifteen me it seems like forever and I am forever sick of seeing or hearing about him!
P.S.  I don't even know his name nor do I care to But I'll google search a picture of him just for the heck of it and post it here.

Monday, August 9, 2010

Speed Racer

There is a new law that a police officer can give you a ticket if he thinks you are speeding even if he has no radar.  The thinking is that  the officer has been trained at the police academy on how to recognize a speeding vehicle.
Well, I never went to the police academy but I can tell you a few hints so you can detect that you are speeding before the cop does.  With apologies to Jeff Foxworthy, here goes.
1.  If everyone you pass is a blur, you might be speeding.
2.  If you are in a pack of cars and pass everyone and they soon become a tiny dots in the distance, you might be speeding.
3.  If you feel like you are on a roller coaster, you might be speeding.
4.  If your gas pedal is touching the floor, you might be speeding.
5.  If everyone you pass gives you the finger, you might be speeding.
6.  If you think everyone else is incredibly slow, say, like turtles, you might be speeding.
7.  If you are singing at the top of your longs to your favorite song, you might be speeding.
8.  If your spouse is clinging to the armrest, you might be speeding.
9.  If your kids say "Wheeeeeee" every time you turn a corner, you might be speeding.
10. If the policeman turns on his red light and steps on it after you go by, you probably are speeding!

Sunday, August 8, 2010

Stay in Line

We have construction going on all over our highways.  You might too.  One of the signs that is prominently displayed when lanes narrow is "Stay in Lane."  The first time I ever saw it I thought it said stay in line.  It is probably because I said that about five billion times  in my lifetime.  I taught kindergarten and had to move those little ones down the hall and out on field trips.  Stay in line became my mantra.  Didn't want to lose anyone and I never did!
I also unpacked the diswasher five billion times.  I know that is an exaggeration but if you are in charge of the chores to maintain your household you know what I mean.  I try to change it up every now and then by taking out the silverware first and the glassware last and the next time take out the glassware first and then the plates.  It still is a dumb and repetitive chore.
I am positive that I have done five billion loads of laundry and every time I finish the last load, someone tosses another dirty article of clothing into the hamper and it starts all over again!!  If you do the laundry for your family you know that is true.
Some things have to done over and over.  I guess that's why we enjoy something that only happens once in a while.  Like fairs and concerts or going out to dinner.  So I am setting myself a goal to go out to dinner five billion times.  It should work out fine as long as I stay in line!

Saturday, August 7, 2010

Nothing Like It

We went for another walk today in Chapin Forest and boy it was a doozy.  I am glad it is cooler today so the sweating wasn't so bad.  We got a little mixed up and took the long way but it was beautiful and so green!
There seemed to be way more uphill than down but I made it.  Next time I am wearing my hiking shoes and not my walking shoes!  I tripped over a tree limb but that wasn't the fault of the shoes just my own neglect.  (As in neglecting to look down at where the path was headed!)
I am kind of a klutz but I am getting stronger so at least I didn't land on my face or anything like that.  That would just be me--go for a walk and break your nose!   But it didn't happen and I am so proud of myself.
The views from the path were beautiful as it goes close to a valley and a former quarry.  I can't wait to see it as the leaves change color.  Don't worry, I'm not in a big hurry for summer to end--I'm just sayin'.
I sometimes wish we had done all this hiking with our kids but we'll just take them now and then since they both have busy schedules and one of them doesn't even live here!
So now we have earned the wine trip we are taking this afternoon and we will give our arms a little workout as well as the workout we already gave our legs!!  Get it??  Lifting the wine glasses??.....OK, I know it was weak but it's all I got!

Thursday, August 5, 2010

Boy, Oh, Boy

This morning we were treated to a delightful film about Tarzan's son.  I bet you think his name is Boy.  That is what Tarzan named him when he found him but you would be so wrong.
His name is Bomba....or Jack....or Korack, depending on who you ask.  I have a hunch that Jane named him Jack.
Anyway,, Bomba  learned a lot from his father about swinging on vines and fighting bad guys.  He even learned the lesson about walking with a cute girl and a monkey, always hold hands with the monkey!
He wrestled with the bad guy in the water but we didn't see if he could summon up animals with a Tarzan yell.
Cheetah was around too.  As a matter of fact I think Cheetah is still around but I haven't heard for sure lately.  At the end, Boy..oh, sorry, Bomba went off into the jungle after saving the day all alone but as the people he saved rode away in their boat, Cheetah joined him up in the tree and I think they held hands again.  As you can see from the pics below they had a long history together.
We had the most fun watching the little bit of the movie that we did, it was a great start to hopefully a great day!

Sunday, August 1, 2010

Wonderful WINO West

I have only two words to say to you ...Mon Ami.   Go there.  It is beautiful.  It has great wine.  It has good food.  They have Happy Hour.  It's not far from Cleveland--only a little over an hour.  Really, you should go there.