Friday, April 29, 2011

Oh, Happy Day 2

Oh boy! The pics of my faves have arrived.  Check em out
That's the dress wrapped in tulle.

Here is the ugly hat cousin!

This is the blue outfit--just ignore that other chick.

LOVE THEM!! Love the Internet for getting these out there so fast.

Oh, Happy Day

I just watched the wedding of the century(so far)!  It was really beautiful.  The bride and groom seemed nervous but happy.  Especially him.  I think he had sweaty palms.  She looked radiant.  Oh, and she got his name right.
Now, that that's out of the way....what a dress!  Grace Kelly much?  I couldn't believe how much that dress reminded me of the Princess of Monaco's.  There were rumors that the bride designed it herself and if she did she got a heavy dose of inspiration from the first one.
In the Cinderella story, there are the ugly stepsisters.  In this story, there were the cousins wearing ugly hats.  Did you check our Fergie's kids?  Yikes!  The one hat looked like a giant stiff bow that started at the top of the girl's head! It was UG-LEE!  I never even looked at their faces or their dresses.
Most of the hats were intriguing which is why I never looked at any of the dresses except a couple stand outs.  The woman in the BRIGHT BRIGHT royal blue outfit caught my eye and the lady whose dress was wrapped with black tulle and had some kind of bow thing on the shoulder were the stand outs for me.
Those two crazy kids should have made friends with more American celebrities.  The poor Beckham's were shown on camera about a thousand times.  He sure is handsome and she sure doesn't smile often.  I know she's pregnant so I didn't even bother to check out her dress.
A lot of the hats looked like dinner plates or frizbees.  I wonder how that style got started?  The Queen had a normal looking hat on and wore bright yellow so she could be spotted.  I heard she always does that.  I was hoping she would wear pink.
Another surprise were the mother of the bride and Camilla both in "almost white" ensembles.  I know they were really gray or beige but they sure looked white on camera.  I thought that wasn't allowed so you wouldn't show up the bride(as if they could).
All week I heard how William would honor his mother at the wedding.  I must have missed it.  I wondered why on Earth he would do that as this was a wedding not a memorial...but the TV reports kept insisting and like I said, I didn't see it.
Prince Charles looks as old as his mother!!  She must be taking some youth potion that none of us knows about.  PC had a cane and I thought it was part of his uniform but it looked like he really needed it.  Old polo injury, perhaps?
Did you see that Harry is getting a bald spot just like his brother?  What a strong gene that one must be.  Harry seemed to be having a pretty good time and it looked like he was trying to jolly his brother up a bit.
When the couple left the church, they were holding hands the old fashioned way(by that I mean like Henry the 8th or even further back) but his knuckles were white and so were hers.  I think they were just holding each other up.
I loved how the bride said "Wow" when she saw the crowd waiting for the kiss.  It was brief and it was repeated but still brief.  One commentator said he lost money on that.  They were even betting on the length of the kiss over there.  Those crazy Brits.
One thing for sure, the Brits are very on time.  Their schedule for the day went along without a hitch.  But where was the parade?  I wanted a parade with all those soldiers dressed in the cool uniforms.  It seemed like there was going to be a parade but nope.
Nobody wishes those two kids more luck than I.  They live in a fishbowl and have to carve some sort of family life out in spite of it.  God bless them!

Thursday, April 28, 2011

Believe Me

I always thought that Donald Trump was a character.  You know, with the hair and everything.  I never thought he was certifiable!
He thinks he is going to run for President and so far, his strategy has been to question Obama's birth certificate and has embraced the idea that he wasn't born in the USA.  Now that the President has released the entire document, the Donald will be mollified when it is examined by experts to make sure it is not a forgery.  How stupid does he think the President and his team are?  Why would they forge a document that is under such scrutiny?   The whole situation is laughable.
Then I heard his strategy for lowering the price of gasoline.  He is gonna look 'em straight in the eye and say "Listen here, buddy" or some such thing and of course, the Arab princes and the oil barons and the foreign oil magnates are going to be really worried and lower the prices in case the Donald says, "You're fired."
How naive can this guy be?  Doesn't he have millions or even billions of dollars?  He thinks he can intimidate those who supply the oil and they'll just cave?  I can see them laughing their asses off while they ignore his wishes.
Mr. Trump has given us many hours of enjoyable television lately.  I loved it when Joan Rivers was on Celebrity Apprentice.  I love that NeNe lady dissing Star Jones at every turn.  That is something he does well.  Keep entertaining us, Donald.  You're good at it and I'm sure it has helped to line your coffers.
Stay out of the political's no place for amateurs.

Sunday, April 24, 2011

Spring has Sprung 3

Well, she's back!  No, not me.  The robin!  She just isn't giving up.  She built that nest there and she's going to stay there by hook or by crook.  We saw her yesterday.  The nest still looks measly but there she was staring at us with a cocky attitude.  Yep, I said a cocky attitude.  If she could talk she would have been saying "What you looking at?"
So we will see.  I will take pics if I can today.......if  her highness will allow it that is.

Saturday, April 23, 2011

Spring has Sprung 2

Oh, I was right all along.  It rained and was crummy here all day yesterday and when Iwnet to show my Daughter and DH the nest, it was all wrecked.  I don't think an animal could get to it so it had to have just fallen apart in the rain. I thought it was a futile attempt and It turns out I am smarter than a robin!  Yay me!!
Poor Mrs. Robin and poor me!  Now no babies to watch.  Sad.

Friday, April 22, 2011

Spring Has Sprung

Even though the weather would never suppoet the idea, Spring is here in lovely Mentor, OH.  How do I know this?  A robin has built a nest at the back of my garage and it has been fascinating to watch.  My garage is attached to the house and when I sit on my family room couch I can see it.  One day, not so long ago, I noticed a robin holding a piece of paper towel or napkin or maybe even tissue paper and it was struggling to take it up to the lamp that is next to the back door of the garage.
I thought that bird was pretty dumb considering the paper was bigger than it was and it kept dropping it about a million times and didn't seem to get the idea that the action was futile.  It finally flew away, the paper got blown away by the wind and I thought nothing more of it.
A couple days later, I had to laugh as there was a long piece of some kind of dry plant hanging from that lamp and I thought to myself that the robin was a dodo and had realized the space was just too small and left for an easier location to build its nest.  Every day for about a week, I would glance out and that one lone "string" was hanging from the lamp and I just had to chuckle to myself about how dumb that bird was.(although not the stupidest bird in the world, that award goes to a cardinal from my childhood).
The last two days I have been really busy.  I was out to lunch with friends for like three hours and I am finally able to do some housework so I didn't look out the window for a couple of days.
Yesterday, Lo and Behold, there's a nest on the lamp.  The bird is there all the time staring at me.  I owe it a huge apology.  It is the most clever bird in the outdoors.(The indoor award go's to my Sis' bird who is ever so smart)
It's pretty secure looking too.  I would love to take a picture but I don't know where the camera is and my phone takes lousy pics.  I will ask DH to take one tomorrow and I will post and when the baby birds arrive I will post again.  That bird is probably the mother bird of all time.  She stuck to it until she made a home for her babies.  I think it's a her.  She is looking a bit chubby so I'm guessing she is filling up with eggs.  I don't know much about a robin's mating habits and I never saw a pregnant robin before so I"m just guessing.  All I can say is that compared to the robin in the above picture, my robin is a lot more shall we say rotund..
So stay tuned and see what happens to Mrs. Robin.  I just can hardly wait.

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Jeepers Creepers

You know who really gives me the creeps?  Lady Gaga?  Not really  Marilyn Manson? Nope.  Freddy Kruger?  Not so much.  The scariest of them all award goes to THE OLSON TWINS!!!
You remember them, don't you?  If you have a child around my kids' ages you probably watched them every week ad nauseum when they were little tykes.  And they were cute.  Tiny and cute.
Now, they are still tiny.  Frighteningly tiny.  And not so cute.  One ounce above death weight is not the least bit cute.  Jutting cheekbones just don't look very appealing.  However their brain power doesn't seem diminished by their lack of sustenance.
They have a clothing line and now they have an eyewear line which is apparently brand new.  They started off as moguls way back when as little girls they started making little movies that went direct to DVD or whatever was the recording device back then.  Now, they are rich, tiny, skinny, and rich.
I don't know why but that scares me to death.  What if one of them decides to follow in The Donald's path and runs for President one day?  How creepy would that be?  I bet you are getting goosebumps right about now, aren't you?  And not from excitement.
I wish that being skinny and rich was not the new standard.  Just think if one of them is President they might make the whole nation go on a diet--a real one.  We'd all be walking around starving but we would look long as we had the official Presidential eyewear!

Sunday, April 17, 2011

Fare Thee Well

Ohmygosh, my soaps are cancelled.  I can hardly believe it's true.  I watched both All My Children and One Life to Live since the first day they were on.  Really.  I watched  the conniving Erica Kane go from a snotty teenager who gave her mother nothing but grief to a grandma who still connives but she claims it's always for the good of her family.
Family is important on the soaps.  They have big expansive families so you really have to watch who you date.  Right, Erica?  She dated her own brother for a while there.  Any new arrival could be related to you in some way.  Need a new leading man?  Bring in Erica's son who she thought she aborted.(I know I know).
Things getting boring in Llanview?  Just give poor old Vicki another personality or two or three.  And if she hasn't enough personalities let her poor daughter suffer from the same condition and the possibilities are endless!
One Life to Live has always been my favorite truth be told.  I guess it doesn't matter any more since  AMC is going away by September.  It is being replaced by something called The Chew.  REALLY?  That's the name you came up with???  But, I digress.  OLTL has Vicki Lord who is played by Erika Slezak.  Her father Walter was in one of my most favorite movies, People Will Talk.  He plays Cary Grant's sidekick.  Erika and I were on maternity leave at the same time back in the day.  Both times.
And right here, I lost half my post.  I don't know how and I'm pretty sure I can't rewrite it with the same spark as I had yesterday.  I was on a tear and related to you all about Vicki Lord and her husband and ex and her kids and her best friend/worst enemy, Dorian Lord.(her step mother)  
Let it suffice to say that it was witty and well written, not unlike soaps at their best.
Good bye, Erica.  Good bye, Vicki.  I will miss your ups and downs, loves and losses, and your general turmoil.  It's been a great run.

Friday, April 15, 2011

The Most Beautiful Girl In The World

According to  People magazine, Jennifer Lopez is the most beautiful woman in the world.  I think she is beautiful and talented and seems like a really nice girl when she is on American Idol.  She has a lovely face, a smokin' hot body and she's a mom. And have you seen those hair ads she's been doing?  WOW!  I was happy to hear she was chosen.
But today, the flack has begun.  People on the Internet(real people not the magazine) are saying she is not beautiful. That she's been chosen because she is on American Idol.  Some say she's been on People's list too many times.  Someone even said "meh" about her.
You know, I'd love to see these naysayers.  I bet they are average like most of us.  They really outdo most of us in judgmentalness.  I know that  isn't a real word but I just made it up as it fits the anti-Jens.  Hmm. I just made up that word too.  You know, as an average person, I enjoy looking at beautiful people of both sexes but I would never feel I could judge who is the most beautiful.
I think back to that old song, The Most Beautiful Girl In the World written by Rogers and Hart.  The gist of the song is that the most beautiful girl in the world is the one you love and who makes you see the world as a wonderful place.  Who can argue with that?  And who can judge that?  I saw Jimmy Durante sing it to Martha Raye in Jumbo.  Look them up if you don't know them and you'll see that I'm right. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
I don't know what criteria People magazine uses for choosing the most beautiful...I'm thinking they are somewhat objective but so what if they aren't.  So maybe JLo is on American Idol and has a new album coming out but so what?  She's still beautiful and I think we should all just relax and enjoy the view.

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Well...that's a Deep Subject

Well, I am making progress.  I can actually breathe a little without screaming in pain.  I can reach things at eye level and waist level.  I can bend down very very carefully if I do a giant plie--very slowly.  I can fold laundry and put it in the dryer or the washer.  I can get it out if I am really careful.
I can't dig in my freezer yet so DH has to be the housewife.  He's doing pretty well but needs some more practice which I'm pretty sure he'll be getting in the coming days.   As he says, one step at a time.  Husbands were not made to be housewives.  I have to say I never got those stay at home dads.  I'll bet the DW spend a lot of time cleaning up what the stay at home dad forgot to do.  Just saying.
I still can't sleep laying down.  I might roll over onto my rib and that would be really bad.  I still can't laugh very much because it hurts.  Also can't make any fast moves.
I have to give up exercising for 4 weeks.  I'm sure I will be completely out of shape by then!  It is driving me crazy that I can't go.  To be honest, I was getting a little tired of the routine but now that I can't go that's all I want to do!  Crazy, huh?
I tried taking a short walk over the weekend and well, you can just forget it.  It hurt!  No kidding, just a little walk down to the end of the street and back.  I guess you don't realize how much your bones all work together to keep you going.  I need to consult Dr. Oz about that.  I've been seeing a lot more of him as I have seen a lot more television in general.  Yesterday, the TW crew was working on the cable box outside of my house and I missed about 53 minutes of All My Children and I was pissed!  I know I can watch it on line any time I want but I wanted to watch it then and there. 
Since our soaps seem to be doomed to cancellation, I don't want to miss any of them if I don't have to.  I made an exception for vacation because that's how I roll.  TV and vacation don't mix unless your watching the weather channel in my humble opinion.
Well, at least I can type and read although I haven't held up a book yet.  Not sure how that would go.  I have to tell my kids I really need that I pad or a Nook or something.  They aren't so heavy as a book.
I can also do my crossword puzzle every day so my brain doesn't completely atrophy.
Oh, and I can drive....a little.  I drove to the doctor and my sister's yesterday(both about 6 minutes away) and last night I was exhausted and a little sore too.  So today I will stay home so I can go out a little tomorrow.  I'm no dummy!
Well, that's my current situation.  I still stand by my advice:  Just Don't do it!!

Sunday, April 10, 2011

Just Dont Do It

Don't break your rib.  Don't crack your rib.  Don't bruise your rib.  I did one of those( the crack) and let me tell you the pain is unbelievable.  It happened Tuesday in one of those you won't believe this situations.  Really, I was washing my hair and that's all you're getting.  Just trust me, it really hurts....a lot.
Breathing hurts.  Coughing really hurts and in the bathroom, well, you don't even want to know.
Don't laugh either.   Don't reach for anything or bend down or reach up.  Don't get up from your chair....oh, wait you have to, Ouch!  
Don't lay down.  Sleep sitting up in the same chair.  
Go to the emergency room.  Take the drugs even if they have side effects.  Side effects go away but not the pain.  Drugs just take the edge off.
Be prepared to fall asleep often.  It's the drugs.  It can't be helped.
Don't drive.  Don't try to exercise in any way.
Don't ask how long it will last.  You probably don't want to know.
Take showers and let the water hit you where it hurts most.  That is temporary relief.
I know I sound like a big baby and maybe I am.  Some people have intense chronic pain and I have a new respect for them, believe me.  Especially if their drugs work as "well" as mine do.
Just take my advice, won't you.  It is really good advice!