Thursday, October 31, 2013

Nurse Jane Fuzzy Wuzzy

When I was a kid I had this game called Uncle Wiggily.  Well, what do you know?  There it is. Up there in the picture I mean. Well, it was a dumb game and I never understood the rules and who in the heck is Uncle Wiggily anyway?  I never heard of him. One thing I always liked that one of the characters in the game was Nurse Jane Fuzzy Wuzzy.
That name stuck with me for my whole life.  If I had to take care of a sick kid, I called myself Nurse Jane Fuzzy Wuzzy.  Not out loud, just in my head because come on now.
My DD is my Nurse Jane Fuzzy Wuzzy as I recuperate from surgery.  Nurse Jane is nobody's fool.  If she tells  you you have to eat protein even if it tastes horrible you eat it.  If she says no doing dishes no matter what you think you can do you should listen to her.  If she takes you for a walk she will pretend to believe you when you say you have to rest but in your head you are running ahead....when you won't be running even in your head for a VERY LONG TIME!!!
She is compassionate but not to a fault.  She wants you to get up by yourself if you can but not split open in the process.  She cooks and cleans and still does a full time job with little or no help from her minions.
I love that Nurse Jane Fuzzy Wuzzy!  And there she is!  Up there in the picture...only my Nurse Jane Fuzzy Wuzzy is much cuter and animated and real.


Wednesday, October 30, 2013

Hospital

Let me tell you it is not any kind of fun being in the hospital.
First, I thought I was having a heart attack.  I wasn't.  That's good, right?
Well, not so much.
 I had a gangrenous gall bladder.  Hurts like a heart attack that doesn't go away.  It is gone now and I will get better but it will take a while.  In the mean time it hurts.  A lot.

Anyway, I don't want to talk about the pain.  I want to talk about the hospital experience.  How nurses are angels among us.  How the food sucks.... a lot.  How my family stepped up to the plate.  How Son's girl intervened on my behalf. She's one of those angels, ie a nurse.  How DD dropped everything to be with me.  How Son told the Gall Bladder doctors to send a letter to the heart doctors who should have never ever sent me home.  How DH is depending on his kids as adults for the first time in his life.  How I can see DH is scared half to death but is trying to be brave.  How he wants to help but doesn't know what to do.
I met one of our former students in hospital this week.  She was the nurse floor manager.  I didn't have her myself but I had her older brother.  She was so happy to see me and I was so proud of her.  What a bonus when a teacher sees and hears about  students' accomplishments.  It doesn't happen often.
I didn't meet any hospital employee who wasn't kind or nice or fun to talk to or interested in me.  And you weren't just a number either.
I know this because Sis was in the same hospital for a small procedure and we had the same post op nurse who remembered me when Sis mentioned my name.  Plus another nurse told her I'm not old.  I really like that one!
If you have to go to the hospital, I'm not saying it will be fun or you will enjoy yourself.  I am saying you'll be among people who really care about others.  What more could we ask for?

Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Ever Hopeful

Today I looked at the front of the newspaper and I was so happy with what I saw.  It said Conservatives Learning.  Boy, oh, boy I couldn't wait to see what they learned.  I picked the paper up and my eyes had played a trick on me.  There was the big headline: Conservatives sue to block expansion and below that article was the headline(not quite as big) One big tent for learning.   I can't tell you how disappointed I was.  I really thought somebody finally learned something in the government.  But, no, it was a trick my eyes played on me.
It's happened before that I see things a little mixed up.  I always get mixed up so it is upbeat or happy or  hopeful.  But it never is.
Wouldn't it be nice if Conservatives learned and Radicals learned and everyone met in the middle?  Now that would be nice.  Then maybe we could get something done in Washington or Columbus(where my particular Conservatives live).
So I'll go on being hopeful and probably still reading things the way I wish they were instead of the way they are.

Tuesday, October 22, 2013

Pollyanna and Polyvore


Pollyanna was a fine Disney film.  I watched it while I was blowing my nose and not moving off the couch.  I came in on it toward the end where she went to the Bazaar and came home and fell out of the tree trying to sneak back home.  She was paralyzed and the Doctor was taking her to the hospital somewhere to get fixed up and the town's people were all waving goodbye.  The end.  What????  I thought I remembered her coming home in a wheelchair and then Aunt Polly turned nice and the Doctor was her boyfriend or possible fiancé  and everyone was so happy and Pollyanna got out of the wheelchair. That's The end.  Right??  Or am I making that up?  I mean what Disney movie doesn't have closure and a happy ending?
Anyway, Pollyanna is a perfect child.  She is upbeat and well behaved(for the most part) and everyone loves here even the most curmudgeony of the curmudgeons.  It could make you ill it  is so saccharine. 
Polyvore.com is a perfect world too.  You can see from the picture that I imagine myself to be  a size four, young and a perfect body.  I love playing Polyvore.  I have made so many outfits some of them have even accidentally ended up here!  That was a while back and before I learned how to turn off the share button.
Anyway, I guess my  point is that we all need a little bit of perfect in our lives.  Mine is Polyvore.  Pollyanna's was...... well, her.  I hope you have a little bit of perfect in your life too.

Monday, October 21, 2013

Suicidal Squirrels and Other Signs of Fall



 
 
I love Fall....for the most part anyway.  I always wonder why squirrels suddenly start running into the street right in front of cars at this time of the year.   Not some of them, ALL of them.  Mass suicide is not the way to propagate the species, Squirrels.  And let me tell you something else.  If this is some kind of game you all invented to weed out the weak among you, it may not be working.  I've seen more squashed squirrels in the last two days than I did all summer.  WTF, Squirrels????????
I really love the changing leaves....for the most part.   My favorite is when they all fall and the wind blows and they all go over in our neighbor's yard.  Well, I'm just being honest.  I bet you wish that happened at your house.  We have one less tree this year so it won't be as bad....for them.  Why our neighbors on the other side's leaves never come into our yard is a mystery.
I love apples.....but not apple cider.  Well, that isn't really right either.  I found out yesterday that I love apple cider with bourbon and vanilla and caramel and pumpkin pie spices.  Who knew?
I don't really like pumpkin pie either....well, maybe a little.  What I really like is pumpkin cheesecake and pumpkin muffins and even that jello pudding they make at this time of the year--stir it up with a little Cool Whip and you have a real treat.
I HATE Halloween.  I think I already covered this but I have to admit I'm going to a Halloween party and I got costumes for me and DH and I'm making tortilla chips shaped like bats.  And, oh yes, I'm lovin' me some Halloween candy.
I love Thanksgiving......for the most part.  I just really hate turkey.  No white or dark meat has ever made me go YUMMY.  Now I love stuffing and I love broccoli casserole and sweet potatoes.  I hate hate hate mashed potatoes.  I have a really good reason but that is for another post.  If you don't really believe me, just ask my Sis.
So that is the fall season to me.  Oh and I forgot to say, I hate football.  Sorry.

Sunday, October 20, 2013

Double Helping

Yesterday, a cold knocked me off my feet.  I think I blew threw 1,000 tissues.  I couldn't get up from the couch and all I wanted was mint tea.  I was sick...and bored.
Television was my friend and showed the movie, The Fifth Element.  I LOVE that movie so much.  Don't ask me why.  It is dumb as all get out.  I love that flamboyant character that Chris Tucker plays.  Gary Oldman is totally creepy.  The bad guys look like something form Star Wars so they aren't that scary.  And what is it about Bruce Willis that is so darn likable?  I'm sure I don't know but I like him a lot.  I've seen it about a hundred times and love it every time.
When it was over, I was sad because what would I watch now while I blew my nose a thousand more times?  OMG, the television is my best friend.  It is playing 12 Monkeys.  I LOVE that movie too.  I think Brad Pitt is just wonderful as the crazy guy.  He does all kinds of crazy stuff and enjoys every second of it.  The story is weird and I don't think it's all that great and I kinda hate the ending but mostly I like it a lot.
I think it is the Bruce Willis thing again.  I don't know what it is about that man.


Friday, October 18, 2013

Time Flies

OK, I was so mad at AT&T because they sent me an email saying I hadn't paid my mobile bill.  Oh, yes I did.  It was right in my checkbook and there was a confirmation on my phone.
I called and finally got a real person and asked her why in the world I would get a bill when I always pay on about the same day every month.  I said look at my history.  I always pay on time.  See in August?  See in September?  Why am I suddenly late??  WTF????????( I didn't say that but I was thinking it)  Now here's the clincher.  And then I say Why can't I just pay on October 7?
A little silence met my tirade.  Ma'am she says it is October  It's the 18th.
OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I said I'll call the "pay now" number.  Thanks.
I'm sure I gave her the laugh of the day.
See what I mean?  Time flies.

Thursday, October 17, 2013

Really Scary

When I was a kid, I was scared to death of Godzilla.   That's right.  He ate Tokyo after all.   We had a theater close to our home and it was in the shopping district that we used so we would see the movie posters hanging outside the building.  It's old fashioned but it is true.  I hated walking by those theaters.  What if they were showing a scary movie?  I might see a monster.  Well, Godzilla was my first.  I must have been 5 or 6 the first time I saw him.
OMG!! Do you even blame me?????????  He is terrifying.......Well, actually he looks like a bad cartoon but I was just a kid, OK?  He gave me what my Sis and I called "the creeps."  I walked to school then and we went on a cinder path through a wooded area behind our neighborhood and came out in a neighborhood of post World War II projects.  They were little houses built fast to house the returning GI's and their families.   I was always positive that Godzilla would come down one of those streets and catch me unaware.         It never happened.
Now, I'm not afraid of much.  Well, that may not be completely true.  But I'm not scared of Godzilla anymore!
 

Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Everything Will Work Out

When I go on vacation I try to work out in the gym facility where we stay.  Some of them are real nice and some are kind of bogus.  This weekend I woke up before 7 AM each day so I decided to work out even though the room was small and there wasn't much equipment.
There was one bike, one treadmill, on elliptical and one stepper.  I am a walker so I was happy to see that the treadmill was open and there was a gentleman on the bike.
I really don't like working out with a stranger but what could I do?  I didn't know the neighborhood so I didn't want to walk outside.  Plus this was air conditioned and had a television.
So the guy had the remote. No surprise. He did get there first.  He was watching The Fresh Prince of Bel Air.  After that was over he changed to Criminal Minds.  Not the choices I would have made but oh well, not so bad.  I could just ignore the TV.  I did kind of kick myself for leaving my iPhone and headphones in the room.
Well, I'm working along and all of a sudden, there was the most unpleasant smell.  At first I thought it was something cooking outdoors but suddenly I realized that the guy had farted!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   FARTED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 
He didn't say excuse me or anything.  Not even anything lame.  What did he think?  That I would think I had done it?  There was nobody else around.  I think there is a rule that if you fart in a small room with a stranger you have to say excuse me.....and look embarrassed.
YIKES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Spooky Elegance

I just went to the coolest wedding.  That's why I wasn't around.  We had heard all kinds of rumors about it but it turned out not to be crazy.  It was beautiful.
The bride looked elegant.  The groom looked tall and handsome.  The zombies didn't hang around for long.  The cake looked like a chain saw gear was stuck in it and they cut the cake with a hacksaw.
The bride's shoes had zombies on them.  The groom wore purple tennis with the Swedish flag embroidered on them very discreetly.
The music was loud and young.  The dancing was frenetic to watch.  Everyone had a good time.
How you combine sophisticated and spooky takes a creative mind.  The bride had so many good ideas.  You could trick or treat at each table because part of the centerpiece was Halloween candy--a different type at each table.  The centerpiece was a white pumpkin wrapped in lace with pearly lights around on a black wrought iron stand.  Beautiful.
There was lots of purple.  Lots of lace.  And lots of little ones in skeleton pj's at the reception.
Weddings are really interesting now.  Most brides pick a theme and stick to it in all the décor and clothing.  I think I like it.

Monday, October 14, 2013

Friday, October 11, 2013

Thursday, October 10, 2013

Princess

Last night I was at a Facebook party and there was a discussion about princesses.  Like which one would you want to be and what kind would you want to be.  It got to be quite a discussion and I came to some conclusions.
First, Rapunzel is out.  Something about that climbing up the hair thing really bothers me.  Not Cinderella either.  Too much housework.  I guess I decided I didn't really want to be any of them.
However, I most resemble the princess and the pea princess.  You know, she had all those mattresses and still couldn't sleep because of the pea.  I have my sleep issues so I guess I relate.
The girls in the picture are all princesses. One is Pretty Pretty Princess. She is my DD.  One is a Naughty Naughty Princess.  She is not my DD.  I forget what they called the third one but I'm pretty sure it was something about being strong and brave.
I picked that picture because every girl is a princess.  Those three named themselves.  They weren't looking for a prince to save them either.  They were independent.  Now that's the kind of princess I want to be.

Tiny Tyrant

Do not make the mistake of thinking this kid is crying.  This is not about crying children in public. I've had a crying child in public while pushing a grocery cart full of watermelons, thank you very much.
This kid is screaming.  Hence, my story.
I was at the library today doing research for my other blog, ReadAroundSue.  It is nice and quiet and I get a lot done in the time I allow myself.  Plus the little ones come in for storytime and they are just so funny.  Well, most of them anyway.  One pulled his mom all the way to the storytime area.  Another little one was late because his folks couldn't find his shoes.  Little stuff like that just tickles me.
Then, after everyone(including shoeless Joe) got settled, here comes trouble with a capital T.  I'd say he was somewhere between two and three but I'm guessing closer to two because the star of his show was NO.  NO,NO,NO.  Louder and louder and louder as his mom and grandma tried to pull him away from the computer.
I'm starting to pay attention now cause I want to see what they do next. It looked like Grandma was in charge.  She said, OK if you won't leave the computer we're going home.  Let's go.
Three guesses what Tiny Tyrant said.
She walked toward him and he kept yelling his favorite word and then she just threatened him again.  She took no action and Mom just faded into the background, looking scared.
Nobody went and picked him up.  Nobody sat next to him to explain. Nobody tried to tempt him to go to the story time.  They just kept yelling and  threatening and doing nothing.  Tiny Tyrant just kept yelling NO.  Wonder where he learned that?
What would I have done?  I would have gotten that kid out of there and out to the car and home again.  Maybe I'd try next week.  Maybe I'd go early and let the kid use the computer first and then have story time.  He was little, he didn't have much of an attention span.  He would have been bored in five minutes.
Heck, I finally tuned them out and I don't even know what happened.  Suddenly they just weren't there.  Don't forget I was a kindergarten teacher when kids still had playtime.  I can tune out  most anything and concentrate on the task at hand.
Poor Tiny Tyrant. He's in charge. And he's too young.

Tuesday, October 8, 2013

Two Face

Once a long time ago I read an article that said if you took 2 pictures of your face and cut them in half and put the two right sides together and the two left sides together you would see two very different people.
One face would be most pleasant and the other face not so much.
Today I was getting a haircut and color so I was waiting for my stylist to return with the gunk and I looked at myself in the mirror and sonofagun, it was true.  The side on the right looked nice, no deep wrinkles, the eye wide and open and the mouth was turned up as if it was about to smile.
The left side was a whole different story.  I had deep wrinkles around my nose and mouth.  I had a skinnier eye that seemed to turn down a bit.  And the mouth, it was so frowny, I couldn't believe it....and I was trying to have a pleasant expression.
Wow, I'm glad I didn't get born with two left sides.  You would really be scared of me.
Now it takes the stylist a while to mix up the gunk so I had plenty of time to stare at myself.  The OK magazine could wait.  I didn't really care why Liam dumped Miley anyway.  My weird face was much more interesting.

Back it Up

Well, Sunday night the kitchen sink backed up.  A lot.  It didn't overflow onto the floor or anything and DH said he'd fix it the next day if I would just empty out the cleaning products under the sink.  No problemo.
Yes, there was a problemo.  DH had to work on some disaster recovery thing at work so our disaster got put on the back burner so to speak.  He didn't even get home until midnight.
So this morning he says to me all cheerful-like, The sink is fixed.  It fixed itself. I tested it twice and everything is fine. Mm-hmm.
It did not fix itself.  I was washing out the blender after my morning smoothie and guess what?  The sink backed up.  Again.
I texted DH to let him know he was in for another amazingly fun night.  He couldn't believe it!  Oh, it's true.  DH, you just have to trust me.
See, we have this thing going on. Our toilet plugs up sometimes, well, a lot.  Not bad but enough to be a gigantic nuisance.  I can't plunge because I have a shoulder injury and I just don't want to anyway.  So I leave it for him. Nice, huh?
Anyway, he always tells me I don't know how to flush.  Really????????????  Just push the handle down, right?  I think I figured that out a long time ago, like when I was 5.
I always say there is something wrong with the toilet.  He doesn't believe me.
Now I am wondering(and believe me I hope I am dead wrong) if the two problems are tied together.  Now wouldn't that be lovely?
So if it doesn't get fixed tonight, the plumber is the next call.  Anyone know a good one?

Monday, October 7, 2013

Need to Know

I just found myself sitting in my car in the garage waiting to hear the story behind the dog in the RCA Victor ads. What the heck??
 The caller thought he was named Victor but the DJ(who, by the way, seems to know a lot of trivia) said no he was named Nipper.
Guess how it got its name?  Because it liked to bite people.  OoooKay. Very original.  Nipper got in the ads after he died because his last owner wanted to pay tribute to him.  The expression in the ads was always, his master's voice.  His little ear was cocked up toward a record player.  It seems to me that Nipper never ever listened to his master while he was alive so I don't get it.  Maybe the last owner( now don't you wonder how many owners Nipper had????) just put him in the best possible light.  Or maybe he just thought he was cute.  Who knows?
Why I wanted to know all this I cannot tell you.  I was a little tired from my workout.  I thought it would be interesting. But, no it wasn't.....at all.

Saturday, October 5, 2013

Say What??

This man is the biggest hypocrite on the planet.  Ok, maybe just one of them. His name is Congressman Randy Neugbauer. He had the nerve to confront a Park Ranger at the World War II memorial and tell her she shouldn't deny the public access.  She should be ashamed.  How could she turn them away?
She was so polite.  She said it was difficult to send them away, sir.  She said she wasn't ashamed though.  Good for her. Too bad she couldn't go further.  Like tell him she was doing what HE and his colleagues instructed.  I'm pretty sure it wasn't her idea to close down the government.
He was the most condescending and  self righteous he could be.  He berated that poor woman in front of a pretty good size crowd.  Maybe he thought they were all from his home state and he would win some brownie points and get reelected when the time comes.
You know, I don't understand a lot of Obamacare and I sure don't understand why a group of grown men would act like a bunch of twelve year olds but I do understand that you don't blame the low man on the totem pole in public.  That is just plain stupid.
You only do that in private...... Oh, you know I'm right.
We all should feel like a bunch of fools for electing these morons to run the country for us.  We should hire people like that Park Ranger and the guy who stood up for her.  He said he was a government employee too and he would like to do his job so the Congressman should do his.  Neugbauer told him to blame Mr. Reid.   The man told him that he blames ALL OF THEM.  They are not doing their jobs.
 Get a budget and get to work.  If you don't like Obamacare and think it won't really work than COMPROMISE.  Look it up in the dictionary.



Thursday, October 3, 2013

Facebook Party

I never got invited to a Facebook party before and I didn't have a clue what I was supposed to do.  I knew how to get to the page.  Of course, I know how to post.  But what do you say?  The party was for an author I know and I really wanted to be there for her.
At first, I felt hesitant.  There was only a post from the author.  Should I reply or post?  I decided to reply.  For a while, it was just the two of us.  Then a funny thing happened.  More people came to the party.
The author posed some questions and people started replying and pretty soon a conversation got going and it was fun.  I even worked up the nerve to start a conversation by asking the author a question and people responded to that too.
Suddenly, through a common love of reading, a group of strangers became friends.  It was just wonderful.
I'm going again next Wednesday, to see my new friends and talk more to the author about her work.  I'm really looking forward to it.  Who knew?

Wednesday, October 2, 2013

Raise Your Hand

Raise your hand.  Simple request. Easypeasy, really.  Unless you have a frozen shoulder. Then you cannot, simply cannot do it.  Even after a shot of cortisone.
It got me to thinking.
Remember raising your hand in school?  Sometimes it was a little raise like just to your shoulder.  Other times it was  like that ooh-ooh raise because you were the only one who knew that answer.  The smartest one.  Funny how the teacher never seemed to call on the ooh-oohers, only the timid raisers.  Probably learned that in old-fashioned teacher school.
When I taught, I called on some of the ooh-oohers but I have to admit not all of them.  It gets a little aggravating when someone is ooh-oohing their hand right in front of your face, only inches away!
In Kindergarten, most kids are ooh-oohers.  The timid ones just try to look invisible.
Which brings to mind the other kind of student, the never-raisers.  They don't want to be bothered for one reason or another.  Maybe they don't know the answer.  Maybe they don't want to try and think of the answer.  Maybe they are thinking about lunch or puppies or the cute girl in the next row.  Maybe they aren't there at all.  Physically, of course, they are.  But if you had no breakfast, your mom didn't bother to get up, she yelled at you when you tried to wake her and your baby brother is left pretty much on his own after you went to school, well, you wouldn't be there either, would you?
Unfortunately there are too many of those kids now.  It used to break my heart.  It's one of the reasons I retired.  I still think about those kids and wonder what happened to them.
I wonder what happened to the ooh-oohers too.  Did they become huge successes?  Did they just turn into pushy people that none of their colleagues can stand?  I don't know the answer to that but it's fun to speculate.
So anyway, that's what frozen shoulder made me think about.  It's not a completely frozen shoulder.  I got to the doctor as it was just starting according to him.  If you have frozen shoulder, you have my sympathy.  If you don't have frozen shoulder, keep raising your hand.  Apparently, it helps you to avoid it.