Saturday, March 28, 2009

Ever Changing

I have my new brown hair and I even changed my picture on the blog to reflect how I look now. I had just gotten home from the salon and had my husband take this picture immediately because it never looked like that again and I knew it wouldn't.
I've had every shade of hair and every haircut known to man. I have been blonde, many shades of red, frosted, streaked, three toned and brown. I had a pixie, a Sassoon,a shag, an Afro, long hair halfway down my back, a bun, hair tucked behind my ears, ponytails, and even cut my own hair! Once in college I was using a razor to trim down the hair on the back of my head and got a little carried away and made a bald patch. It was just a little one but still...right before a first date with the guy who turned out to be my college boyfriend!
My sister and I used to streak each other's hair. We even sang California Girls one time and we swore we would never be gray. I blew that promise for a while but I am back with a vengeance. Don't know how long I will have the brown hair but you can be sure it won't be gray again for a long, long time.
It must be in our genes though. I remember my mother getting her hair dyed kinda blue. And my daughter once dyed her hair pink. I don't think we can help ourselves.
Personally, I don't like being in a rut. I love to change my hair style and color. You know, I don't think I can change my style of clothes or my makeup very much so that just leaves the hair--easy and usually pain free!
So I will keep changing my picture as I keep changing my hair. I give the brown hair 6 months tops!

Friday, March 27, 2009

Oh, Those Commercials IV

I know I am always knocking those commercials so I thought I'd do a change of pace and tell the ones I like. There aren't too many but the ones I like are gems in my opinion.
I love the ad where the kid pulls into the parking place and hits the car next to him and the old woman wails on him with her purse. She is really hammering away on him and her old old husband encourages her to get him good. What a hoot. Good to see powerful old people. It's really for some car insurance but I don't care it's just funny.
No matter what they do, I love those barbarians. I don't even know what the ads are for but they are a scream. Somebody must sit up at night thinking of things for them to get screwed up. When the guy is bathing at the gas station and the guy on the plane has that growling pet(Can't even imagine what that is) I just have to laugh. I love everything they do! Much, much better than the cavemen.
Orville Redenbacher is back in his second incarnation. I am only glad to see him because they just took out clips from the old ads and didn't try to CG his head onto another body like they sometimes do. I mean, how creepy would that be? I have to admit they did try it once but quickly got rid of that ad. It's bad enough when they do it to actors who are still living on their own bodies, isn't it?
I'm also enjoying the new PC kid. She is very sophisticated(she's all of 7) and knows (as my son was kind enough to point out) more than I do about computers. He's right. I got laughing about how I could send an email or write in this space and tell everyone on my ad that I was 59 and I'm a PC! Somehow I don't think they will be hiring me any time soon. Oh, well, another career opportunity down the drain.
Ads during the day and the ones at night are so different from each other sometimes my husband sees an ad and thinks it's new and I've seen it one hundred times! He's like me; he loves those little PC girls because they are so adorable...... Hey wait a minute, so am I...think I'll go apply for that job after all!

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Up to My Neck in Suds

No, I am not having a dish washing marathon. I'm not in the world's longest bubblebath. I am totally engrossed in my soap operas these days. Not a day goes by that I can just skip them or fast forward through most of them. I still fast forward some but not as much. Here, in no particular order, are some of the things going on.
Tracy Quartermaine(GH) is wearing the most Gawd-awful suit you have ever seen. It is red and it looks like someone dyed a dead animal and plastered it on the back of the jacket. I can't describe it any other way. It is so ugly it is laughable and believe me, I laugh every day. I don't know what is going on with her(other than bad taste) as that is one part I can FF through.
On One Life to Live, there is so much going on I hope I can remember it all. Let's start with Starr as she seems to be in the center of things. Remember how I always say she has more sense than all the adults put together? Well, not so much right now. She has a giant crush on her teacher who happens to be the son of the doctor that delivered Starr and Cole's baby, which supposedly died but didn't because her cousin with multiple personalities stole her child and left her dead one in its place. She kissed him at a school dance and Cole(her ex) saw her and he is on drugs because his mother(who was abducted by Starr's father) was ignoring him so he got in his car with Matthew(who is the son of the DA) and got in an accident which resulted in Matt being paralyzed from the waist down and the discovery that Shane(the asthmatic boy) who was in the other car with his mom has Leukemia!
Now, in the next room, we have Starr's mother who was stabbed in the shower a la Psycho and was in a coma while the father who somehow has escaped jail time for all he has done (and I haven't told you the half of it) is trying to get custody of Starr and her little brothers. Mom is awake as of yesterday and we shall see what transpires.
Starr's other cousin(sister of the cousin with multiples) and her fiance have discovered what has happened with the babies and are trying to figure out how in the heck to tell everyone without all h-e double hockey sticks breaking out.
Through most of this drama either Starr or her gramma are carrying around Starr's youngest brother(about 2 and a half maybe more) and discuss these various goings on in front of the kid who never fusses or acts up(I swear he's drugged). Must check with Cole on that.
Over in Pine Valley, things are heating up too. There is a custody battle, a corporate take over, a teenage girl who hit a woman over the head with a crystal vase and put her in the hospital, Adam Chandler is wasting away in a hospital out of town(must be on vacation), Erica is bribing judges, but so is Dr. David. Kendall(recently awoken from her coma) is torn between two lovers while juggling motherhood(just barely, she has a nanny... I'm not sure the kids even know who she is) and Greenlee has been declared dead due to DNA tests(so I'm sure she's alive) and poor Opal who is somewhat psychic is having a hard time sleeping because Greenlee's soul is alone and troubled. Yikes!
Needless to say, I thank the higher power(no,not the daytime executives at ABC) that I live in good old boring Mentor, Ohio....but I love my little trips to the 'burbs of Llanview, Port Charles, and Pine Valley each day.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Goin' to the Chapel

Well, old David Letterman finally bit the bullet and married the mother of his child. It sure took him long enough--the kid is five years old. I know most men are reluctant to get married but that is pretty ridiculous.
I don't know what she sees in him anyway. I think he is probably rude and superior. I never cared for his sense of humor and I HATE the way that Paul, the bandleader, sucks up to him. Come to think of it I can't even stand to look at that band leader, he looks like the fourth blind mouse to me. Of course, he probably doesn't live with them so she doesn't have to put up with him.
I hope she's happy. I'm sure she is happy for her son's sake. I also hope that stalker has finally left Dave alone. Now that would be creepy. Maybe they waited to get married til that stalker was dealt with.
Bruce Willis got married too. I wondered what he was waiting for. Well, now I know. The new wife looks like a more exotic version of Demi Moore. Really, check out the pictures. She's the younger version too but we won't go there.
The whole family was there too, even his son, Ashton. No, I know he isn't Bruce's son... I was just kidding. That would be pretty funny if he was though, wouldn't it?
Both these ceremonies were private and not expected. I wonder if Bruce and Dave talked??

Sunday, March 22, 2009

I'm Ready for My CloseUp, Mr. DeMille

These new television screens that are so big and also in high definition may bring about a change in television make up and commercials soon. The present day make up and close ups just don't hack it on HDTV!
I noticed it first on my soap operas. One guy, who is not old by any means but like the rest of us is not getting any younger, has deep grooves in his forehead which the makeup staff tries to cover up with, uh, makeup. I never noticed the grooves on his forehead on the old television but now that his head is almost as big as mine, MAMMA MIA!!!!! Those are some grooves he has! They kind of get smoothed out in the middle so he looks even sillier than if they went all the way across his forehead. I can't stop staring at it and things are soaping up and I need to concentrate on the story line.
Poor old Andy Rooney, on Sixty Minutes, has the same problems times 1,000. He has deep grooves all over his face and they try their darnedest to smooth them over but it isn't working. He'd be better to embrace his old fogeyness and lose the makeup.
And ...let me make this clear I love food...there are the close ups of the yummy food at a restaurant that shall remain nameless. MMMM try our spinach dip and there are these giant strings of cheese and some other unidentifiable glop that looks unfortunate at best. Then pan up close to the steak-MMMM you can see the striations in the fancy piece of shoe leather. Food does not look appetizing close up and in HD and GIANT SIZED!! Trust me. I can hardly stand to look at the ad.
Now, if the powers that be are smart they will pan back from the food--can't you hear them now to the cameraman--Step away from the food.--and I might go out to eat again. And poor soap opera hunk, lose the makeup, you don't need it and if you saw yourself you would probably be upset! And Mr. Rooney, come on, you love being an old curmudgeon--wipe off the pancake and get on with it... Speaking of pancake, they look gross close up too.

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Once A Mom

I sadly read the reports that Natasha Richardson died after a skiing accident. She has two young boys. They must be devastated as well as her husband and mom.
I also read that the paramedics were turned away from the scene. Now, I don't know if their arrival would have made a difference but I can understand why they were turned away. As moms, we minimize our own pain. I can imagine Ms. Richardson saying stuff like Oh, I'm fine and Really, I'll be fine and It's nothing.
She might have been a little embarrassed because she was on the beginners slope but I think the overriding reason that she didn't want help was that she didn't think it could be that bad.
Once you are a mom, your own trials and pains pale in comparison to your kids. Their needs and pains and trials take precedent over yours.
She probably didn't want her family to be worried. Maybe her boys were standing by looking worried so she sucked it up and made light of the whole thing for their sakes. She probably did feel fine--until a little later.
She probably wanted to set a good example for her sons. Maybe she wanted to show them how brave she was and how she didn't crave attention when she didn't need it.
Of course, this is all speculation on my part but being a mom, I think I might be right. Moms want to be strong for their kids and set a good example.
This young woman's passing is very sad, hopefully, not unnecessary. I'm sure the details will come out--after all, she is a famous actress from a famous family married to a famous actor. When it does, I will feel even sadder for her. She obviously wasn't interested in anyone's unnecessary attention. Rest in peace, Ms. Richardson. I think you were a real mom to the end.

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Lady and the Tramp??

My favorite Disney movie of all time is Lady and the Tramp. I loved that movie so much. I loved the music and the swaggering "Peg", the dog(voiced by the incomparable Peggy Lee) and the nastiness of the Siamese cats(also voiced by Lee). Even though Tramp was a dog I could understand his appeal--he was fun and took risks and was romantic to boot(remember the spaghetti scene?).
I also got the appeal of Lady. Misunderstood rich girl meets trampy boy. He falls hard--how could he resist a lady?? Not that he had any long term plans, mind you. He was going to use her and abuse her but guess what...he fooled around and fell in love.
Now I always thought that Lady was an innocent dupe in all of this but recently I have been looking at screensavers at Disney.com. and I have changed my mind. She is really a little minx!
The wall paper I have now is Lady and Tramp in a big heart--just their cute little doggy faces and he is looking at her adoringly. She is not looking right at him or me but down and a little over to the side..sorta the Barbie thing but shyer. She has a tiny little smile on her face and all I could think was she had the whole thing planned!!!!
That mean old Aunt was probably in on the whole thing too. She was a little extreme after all--making Lady wear a muzzle and all. Now I know it was all for dramatic effect to trap the Tramp!!
Tramp wasn't the only sucker for the Lady's wiles either. Remember Trusty(the big bloodhound) and Jock(the little Scottie)?? Trusty ran out in traffic for her and almost got killed!!
And what did he get for thanks--Lady "married" Tramp and had his brood!
So who is the user and abuser in this story? I think we all know the answer to that now!

Monday, March 16, 2009

Adventures In Greed

That's what AIG stands for in my book. How dare this company take our money and use any of it to pay a gigantic bonus to the people who directly sent the company into the mess it is in? I'm not alone in my anger. Whoopi Goldberg practically had a coronary this morning about it. She said they shouldn't try to "bend us over" like this. SHE'S RIGHT!!
AIG should be giving back to the community instead of to its highest ranking employees. Or how about these bonuses be used for charitable donations? Or how about they get a bonus and share it among the members of their division.
I'm fully aware that none of this is going to happen. I wasn't born yesterday. I'm really, really glad I wasn't born yesterday. What kind of world are these poor kids going to inherit? I'm not just talking about the economy. These kids will be responsible for the largest group of Senior Citizens and the smallest Social Security fund in history.
The President keeps saying that this is a time for change. Well, I challenge even just one executive at AIG to refuse the bonus. You are supposed to be the best and the brightest..so act like it.

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Brainiac

Boy, am I smart!!! I didn't even know how smart I was until today. I just read in the Scientific America magazine that the big revelation from some scientist in the 20th century is that we can't understand everything in our universe! Well, no duh! I've known that forever!
Here are some things I will never understand.
How people keep from driving into those big pits at the Lube Stop.
How people eat octopus.
Why Will Ferrell is famous.
That anyone finds Will Ferrell funny.
How that girl can have 14 kids.
Why people want to be on Dancing with the Stars.
How the economy really works.
Why Dennis Kucinich thinks he should be the President.
How people can hurt animals.
How microwave ovens work.
People with thick accents.
Why people laugh at videos of people getting hurt.
Why people give you the finger.
Why stuff that is bad for you tastes so good.
Why stuff that is good for you isn't all that appealing.
Why we don't have flying cars.
Why Twitter exists.
How kids get to be bullies.
Why Andy Rooney is still on tv
Why with all the tv channels, there is never anything to watch.
Why laundry never ends.
Why anyone reads the meandering thoughts of a fify-nine year old woman!!

Orange


Orange you glad I didn't say banana? Remember that old knock, knock joke? Even my kindergarten students could remember it. You just keep saying knock, knock and when they say who's there you say banana until they get sick of it and the last time you say orange... get it?
I was never good at telling jokes. I do know another one at the present time. It is this: What do you call a cow with two legs?? Lean meat. Get it?? Don't you always hate it when somebody says get it after a joke?
I used to know this really long joke about the Pope but I can't remember it anymore. I learned it way back in the seventies and it has finally slipped my mind. You should be glad because it would take forever to read.
When we were in Disney World we went to the Monster Inc. show and they asked you to send them jokes before the show so I went with the old standard. What did the mayo say to the refrigerator? Shut the door, can't you see I'm dressing? Nobody laughed. I don't think people realize that mayo is like dressing. They only think of Italian or Ranch. They don't know there is another kind of dressing. If they ate Miracle Whip they might know and maybe they would have laughed.
I love to hear jokes. One time at school, I don't remember why, but kids told jokes over the public address system. One kid told a joke about a man in a bar(I Know) who kept ordering drinks and he kept losing body parts until he disappeared. When the other customer said to the bartender Wow did you see that?? The bartender said,"Yep. He should have quit whilehe was still a head." It was hilarious and so inappropriate that it made me laugh even more.
Comedians used to tell jokes but not anymore. Now they have routines. I think I could remember a routine. See, I always had a secret desire to be a comedian. I think I could make people laugh except most of them are based on the person's life and I am pretty normal. Some weird stuff happens to me but not enough for a routine. I get stepped on in the mall a lot(I think I am invisible) and I get in trouble a lot but I'm never quite sure what has happened that was so bad.
The other day I was in a store at the mall with my sis when a woman called to us rather loudly,"Ladies." We both jumped out of our skins but guiltily turned around(mind you, we had done nothing). She asked us if we wanted to try a new fragrance. After turning her down,we both started laughing. We get in trouble so easily.....well, we were both paranoid!
See that is a little bit funny but not enough for a routine. Other stuff happens at the mall too..we swear one sales clerk was following us around listening to our conversation and a while back, there was one saleswoman we swore thought we were shoplifters. She followed us around every time we went in that store.(maybe she liked our conversation too, I don't know)
Anyway, it isn't easy to be funny. It has to come naturally...orange you glad I didn't say banana?

Saturday, March 14, 2009

Shall We Dine??

We went out to dinner last night at a real restaurant where you sit down and everything..on a Friday night. It was the second time this week that we were out to dinner. On Monday, our son took us to a lovely dinner at a local restaurant. But on Friday!! Like a date!!
Well, my husband had to work late as he is on call this weekend and got one just as he was about to leave the office. I hadn't eaten much during the day and for lunch I only had a specialty coffee and a cookie with my sister.(We hardly ever do that but it is FUN)
By the time we got to the restaurant I was starving and we had to WAIT!!!!! I forgot you have to do that sometimes. There were no free tables and we sat on a really comfy couch waiting our turn for about 15 minutes which seemed like an eternity to me.
When we got our table the waitress brought rolls right away so I dove in. I never never eat bread in a restaurant--well, hardly ever. I ate two before our drinks came. I ate one with dinner and one after dinner. I was starving, remember??
I also had a lobster tail and homemade potato chips. It was yummy but not as good as that bread! What is it that sometimes bread just is the thing?? I am still thinking about the bread with longing. I wish I had some for breakfast.
Wait! I think I know why I am still jonesing for bread. It was more like cake. You all might remember that I am a cake hound. The plain little rolls were so soft and melt in your mouth and the cheesy biscuits were a little sweet as well as tangy. The texture of both of them was like cake! No wonder I want some for breakfast--my whole family knows that cake is the breakfast of champions!!

Friday, March 13, 2009

Green

We are hearing a lot about money these days. Personally, I hate money. I worried for years about it and had a 25 year stomach ache over it. I wish you never had to think about money but you do. I try to put it in perspective now. I have enough(just) and it is all right.
I saw a man on the news yesterday who had a six figure income and suddenly lost his job, then his home and now he lives in a RV...on the street somewhere in California. I guess he couldn't save money while he was pulling down those six figures but if it was only 100,000 then in California, that isn't that much when you consider the cost of real estate out there.
I saw another man who gave each of his employees(in a small pharmacy) 700 dollars each in 2 dollar bills to spend in the community. The only rule was they had to spend it locally. That money made so many people happy. The piece showed one business owner showing off how many 2 dollar bills she had. You never saw anyone so excited and just over a few 2 dollar bills! That gesture not only helped the local economy but it also helped the local morale.
Another man I saw was buying skates at garage sales in his hometown and was giving them to kids who needed skates and just couldn't afford it. Since kids grow, the family just gave them back when the kids outgrew them and could borrow another pair. The man said he found them for 25 cents or so and he couldn't stand them going to waste in other people's garages. By word of mouth, the thing got going and he has a garage full of skates in all sizes. At first, I thought that it was a silly thing but they lived in Maine and I guess there is not much else to do during the long winters.
I try to spread the wealth a little too. This year I am only giving to one charity... the food bank. I can't stand the idea of people not having enough to eat right in my own community. I always give to them but this year they will get all the money I usually give to other charities. I know all charities are suffering but what is more important than food??? Ok,housing too. I will send a couple of checks to Habitat for Humanity too. But most of it is going to the foodbank and that's that.
I still hate money. There are a lot of songs about money from Pennies from Heaven to Money for Nothing and the Chicks are Free....my four year old daughter's favorite song!! Personally, I always liked Brother, Can You Spare a Dime? Lucky for me, the answer to that is Yes, I can and it's going to the foodbank!

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Brown







Next Tuesday I am going to the hairdresser and I am dying my hair back to brown. It has been its natural gray for over a year now and I am getting tired of it. It is pretty and shiny and suits me but I always like to change my hair and this is the change I decided on.



I'm a little nervous about it. I'm not sure if I want it to be light brown or reddish brown or darkish brown. I'm sure Corrine(my stylist) will have some ideas and I trust her but I do want to decide for myself and not be a sheep about it.



I had brown hair when I was a girl and then at 15 started coloring it and never stopped until about 2 years ago. Even with my very short hair it took almost a year for all the color to grow out and the gray to appear completely. I've had blond hair, frosted hair, streaked hair, red hair, dark red hair and once I even had "Snow White" hair--you know, back as ebony. Not such a good look for me..I think you need skin as white as snow to pull that look off.



My face is pretty red. I have that rosacea stuff and it is hard to control. If you eat too many spicy foods or drink the wrong wine or eat too much fatty stuff and it can flare up with a vengeance. So red hair is O-U-T. I have enough red in my life(if you read yesterday's blog).



I'm not sure if the silvery part of my hair will come out lighter and look like highlights or if my hair will be all one color. If it is going to be just one color I might need highlights put in. Plus I am kind of growing my hair a little because I got tired of it being so short. I will never have long hair again because it is getting too thin as I get older and it looks pretty silly. I would love to grow it so long that I could make a chignon at the back of my head but I don't think I will be able to do that.



We had a great aunt who had a chignon and I thought she was the most beautiful woman. She always wore a hair net over it and sometimes it had little sparkles or pearls on it. She always wore a black dress when she was dressed up and I thought she was the height of sophistication. She always smelled really good too...a combination of floral, cigarette smoke and just a hint of alcohol on the breath. I was six. She was sixty. Just about the age I am now.



Anyway, if she was alive today I am sure she would be hip and would dye her hair and cut it and everything. So I am going to do it for her!...and for myself!!



Wednesday, March 11, 2009

RED


Red is my favorite color. I am a Scorpio and we are supposed to be passionate and red is the color of passion so I guess that's why. It doesn't explain why it was my favorite color in kindergarten, but whatever. It still is my favorite color.

I love red clothes. When I wear red, I feel pretty and like I am expressing myself. It helps me feel happy and upbeat. I always know when I am depressed--i pick gray. It becomes my favorite color. I have a ton of red clothes and quite a few gray clothes.

I especially like red with black. You don't want to overdo red. It is way to overpowering.

I love red in my home decor. I just got a red leather chair for Valentine's day--something I've wanted for a very long time! I love red roses and red china--not to be confused with RED CHINA. Don't love them!

I even love red food. I am shocked at how many of my recipes start with "open a can of tomato sauce." Tomato products are really good for you. It has loads of potassium and antioxidants. I love strawberries and raspberries too. Coincidentally, they are really good for you too. Always loved ketchup on my burgers and shrimp with plenty of sauce! I even drink V8 juice--not that tasty..but very good for you!

My son used to live in a condo that had red painted walls. Heaven, you say?? Not really...it was a little overwhelming. I guess I only like red as an accent...at least in home decor.

Once I made myself a red evening dress. I loved it so much. I wonder what ever happened to it? Not that it would fit me anymore but it would be fun to have.

Clifford, the big red dog was always a favorite to read to my students and my own kids.

When I was a kid, I loved red pop.

I once had my hair dyed red--REALLY didn't like that. Maybe because it was really more orange than red.

Oh, and my face is really red most of the time. Especially when I am embarrassed--like right now. Think I went overboard on the red story....oops, my bad.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Everything's Working Out

I am sitting here trying to get myself psyched up to go and work out when my DH gets home from work. Working out in the evening pretty much sucks but it is the only time we can go together(except for the weekend) and I hate to go alone. I won't go alone. I can talk myself out of it so easily--I got up too late, I just washed my hair yesterday and it will be fine today if I don't work out, I ate breakfast too late, I have to pay bills, my cat wants me......I can go on and on.
Working out is ok I guess. I am not a very motivated exerciser(see first paragraph, re: excuses) but the treadmill is okay. I am trying to kick my ass a little more because I think my body was getting used to the routine and it stopped being effective. SO now I work harder and get sweatier than ever and need a shower as a wipe off just doesn't cut it.
Dinner gets later and later too. Sometimes we get a veggie pizza on the way home and sometimes I cook. I hate that! Dinner doesn't get served until 8:45 even when I cook ala Rachel Ray!
Once I get going on the treadmill though, I feel strong and good. Those endorphins can really fool you! I do enjoy having my music going and now that I have my MP3 player and all those songs from Napster, I never have to listen to something I don't like. I can switch it up and watch TV too, if I want.
So, wasn't that a great psych up?? I can hardly wait to get going. Oh, wait, do I have to put my tennis shoes on? I'm not sure I want to do that!

Monday, March 9, 2009

Sleepless in LA

I have been twittering and I have to say it is totally weird. Some people are following me but I am not sure why as I am completely new to the game and boring! I write about making ravioli and waiting for my DH to get dressed for the gym. Still, they follow. SO I guess I have to try to be a little more interesting.
Nobody else seems that interesting either come to think of it. Just little, random thoughts are flowing out there. My favorite is Ashton Kutcher. I don't know why I am following him--I think my daughter suggested it. She said he is interesting and intelligent. SO far I haven't seen much evidence of either but I am telling you the man never sleeps!
He must be really addicted to the twittering thing. He twitters about every 2 or 3 minutes. Of all the people I follow, he is the most prolific. I know he isn't talking to me but what in the heck is he talking about? And how does he have so much time to twitter anyway?? Doesn't he have deals to make and producer-y things to do?? Shouldn't he be taking meetings and acting?
Maybe someone is driving him around all the time and he's just bored. Maybe he is sitting at the side of his pool and doing nothing but twittering, I don't know.
It seems to me that a young man like him would have better things to do but what do I know? I just hope he isn't twittering while driving or doing something else important. I'd hate to hear he was in an accident because of being on Twitter.
I suppose someone will have an accident some day and blame it on Twitter if they haven't already. I'm sure the judge would be completely understanding--he or she would probably be twittering while the trial ensued.(I say this with total sarcasm in case you couldn't guess)
Twittering only takes a second or two but I hate to see us become a Twitter nation...our lives meted out in sound bytes(or is it bite??). I prefer the rambling style of the blog, can you tell?

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Happy Birthday, Doll!!



Tomorrow is the 50th birthday of one of my best friends. I have known her since I was nine years old and to tell the truth I probably had a little girl crush on her. She was beautiful but nice. She was blond, but not from a bottle. She had the most beautiful clothes. But best of all she did whatever I told her to do. Her name is BARBIE.


Yes, you know her too. That blond bombshell who is based on a German doll from a porn store. She isn't always a blond...she is African American, Asian, European, and designer chic. She is a pop star and a punk rocker. She has a ton of hair and it always looks good. Her wardrobe is designed by famous design stars and she has a gaggle of stylists and hair consultants.


It never goes to her head though. She always has a twinkle in her eye and a smile on her face. She doesn't get all grumpy and she never acts like a diva(unless you make her).


I don't know why I loved Barbie so much from the get go. I just know I saw her and I had to have her. I couldn't wait to dress her in her gold lame gown or her red velvet coat. She didn't have a boyfriend at first but that was fine...who cared about boys?


When Ken did come along, he was pretty lame. He was really just another accessory. He went through so many metamorphoses that he was sometimes unrecognizable so about 5 years ago Barbie dumped his ass. They remain friends however. He still shows up. Recently, I saw a reproduction of Ken, the football player. All I want to know is what took her so long?? He is obviously gay. He probably had a crush on Midge's boy, Alan all along. But I digress.


I started collecting Barbies around 15 or so years ago. My absolute favorites are Snow White Barbie(not a blond hair in sight but she is still beautiful) and Barbie, the Bowler(who looks more like original Barbie than original Barbie to me). She is definitely a blond bombshell even in a bowling shirt!!


I always liked the way original Barbie was kind of looking over to the side--like she didn't want to be too involved or was a little embarrassed that she let herself be used for a mannequin. She always looked like there was something more interesting than you over there.


Modern Barbie looks directly at you with her giant eyes. She hardly looks herself anymore unless you buy a collector Barbie or a reproduction Barbie. The new doll doesn't look like she stands a chance against those Bratz, who look like they carry a concealed weapon. They have a cocky look to them which makes wholesome Barbie pale by comparison.


But today I heard that every three minutes someone buys a Barbie doll. What a relief. I was afraid I was going to be the only one left.


So, Happy Birthday, Barbie...long may you reign as the queen of dolls!

Good Night Sweetheart

I really don't like it when we have to "spring ahead." The time change always does me in. Last night I went to bed at my usual time. This morning I got up at almost 10:00. I feel like the day is shot when I get up that late.
Before you know it, it's noon and then 3 and then time to make dinner and then time to go to bed. The day seems to rush by faster than a speeding bullet. I wish I could say it only happens on the first day of DST but it goes on for about a week. I'll be dragging my can around like I am in a daze.
I don't think I got over the lack of sleep from vacation and now this happens! I had no idea this was the weekend of the change. If my sister hadn't mentioned it I would have been really taken by surprise and that would have been nothing but bad.
I don't really sleep all that well anyway. I wake up at the slightest noise( left over from when the kids were little, no doubt) and my husband snores like a freight train at times. Then I sleep on the couch. Not the coziest of beds but at least I sleep.
I also have a pretty active dream life. I don't always remember them but I know I enjoy them while they are happening. For a while, I dreamt I was redecorating a house with my husband. It had a sunken living room with a baby grand piano and we painted the dining room together. There was a pool out back and if you kept walking you came to the beach. Those were good dreams and I still don't know why I had them. For a while, I was convinced I would see that house when we were driving around but I never did.
I used to dream about being absent from gym class or forgetting to study for a test but those went away after I retired from teaching. Those used to scare me more than nightmares. I guess those were my nightmares. Gym(when I had to go) was a living nightmare as I recall.
Most nights I sleep around nine hours....if you don't count the time it takes to fall back asleep after peeing twice or three times a night. Then it is probably around 8 and a half.
I hardly ever have insomnia but the last time I did I worked on my book and watched some dumb Johnny Depp movie that started at 4 am and I finally fell asleep until my husband got up around 6am.
Sleep may be overrated but it seems we all covet it. I heard you are supposed to sleep less as you get older but so far that hasn't been true for me. Some days I think I could sleep all day and then go back to bed at night. I love sleeping. I love dreaming.
I hate getting up in the morning. If I wake up any time after 9 am I always bolt out of bed and admonish myself for sleeping so late. For heaven's sake, where do I think I have to be?? My volunteer job is over and I have no early morning plans(I'm no dummy). I think it is just that old work ethic from all those years of teaching.
I know some people say you can sleep when you're dead, but I am all for sleep while we are here on Earth. It's pretty nice and when you go without it, it's pretty awful. We tried that on vacation and it was tough. I felt somewhat braindead from lack of sleep. Well, I sure made up for it last night!

Friday, March 6, 2009

Spitting Mad

A long time ago I heard a story about a woman who hated her husband so much that every morning she spit in his orange juice. Really. I trust the source implicitly. All I can say is he must have been some kind of jerk to have his wife do that. He wasn't unfaithful or anything major, she just couldn't stand him. Being a quiet kind of woman, she exacted her revenge in the most subtle way.
I am never subtle when I am mad. I have railed and ranted and swore and smacked and yelled and cried. See, I told you. Not subtle in the least. Sometimes when I am mad, I just turn off toward the person I am mad at...that keeps me from railing and ranting and swearing and smacking and yelling and crying. I can be cold as an iceberg and look right through the person I am mad at.
I'm pretty mad now because someone I know who was very good at his job got let go under the shadiest of circumstances. This is a good guy who worked hard and loved what he was doing. He's almost retirement age but not quite and I know he would love to continue working. Now where in the world is he supposed to get a job? Especially in this economy? Who is going to look at a 60 year old man and say "oh yep, he's the one" when there are hundreds of twenty somethings who would take the job at (probably) a lower salary?
So I am really mad. The problem is I'm not sure who to be mad at. The leader of the board of directors?? The whole board??? The economy?? You can't freeze out the economy....or wait, maybe you can.
If I decide to ignore it and go about my business of spending and going out to eat and travelling maybe I can keep looking right through the economy. I'll just ignore it and maybe it will go away and leave us alone!

Thursday, March 5, 2009

All A-Twitter

I am hearing more and more about twittering. I don't really get it but I am determined to do it. If I am right, I can twitter from here at my desk. Some twitter from their phone. I won't do that --my phone is not fancy enough.(i.e. I have no texting capabilities)
Lots of famous people twitter. Jane Fonda(now 71 years old) does. Ashton Kutcher and his wife do. Brent Spiner and Wil Wheaton do too.( They are from StarTrek: The Next Generation..you know, the one with Capt Jean-Luc Picard)
Not so famous people twitter too. My daughter does. My sister does. Some of my daughter's friends twitter too. One of her friends even got in trouble for using Twitter. Isn't that something? Somebody got in trouble with something I know nothing about. Well, something legal. There is probably a lot of stuff I know nothing about but I assume they are not legal.
Even the President twitters. Actually, some one does it for him..the official Twitterer, I guess.
The nicest Twittee I've heard about is Shaq. Apparently, he does it from the bench and when he is out and about. He even lets fellow Twitterers approach him in public and talks to them and everything.
You can network while Twittering and you can tell someone you are doing your laundry or eating a turkey sandwich. I am not sure why anyone would want to know those things..but they may be vitally important to some.
I don't know exactly what you call somebody who Twitters. I tried Twitterer but that's a mouthful--it's even hard to read! Twittee seemed ok. I know for sure you better not call them Twits because that isn't very nice. My daughter said something about Tweeting, but I don't think I can call any body a Tweeter without laughing. Calling someone a Woofer couldn't be far behind.
Anyway, you can get followed on Twitter too. 52 people follow my daughter. I'm not sure if I'm proud or worried! What is she doing that is so fascinating to so many people?? I am a little nervous about trying it as I'm not sure anyone would want to follow me. I mean, why would they?? My life is going to the grocery store, going out to lunch, going shopping...well, maybe it's not that bad after all!!
So to Tweet or not to Tweet is the question of the day?? Will I or won't I...only time will tell.

PS You should have seen all the highlights that the spellchecker picked up!!! It must "think" I am nuts!

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Holy Cow!

Ive had a long relationship with cows. Not real ones. I collected cows for years and many people said when they thought of cows, they thought of me. Some compliment!! I had cows all over my kitchen until I finally tired of them a few years ago and gave them the boot(except for a precious few). I even own a cat that moos, compliments of my nephew.
I really thought I had no more interest in cows, especially after being introduced to the back part of one but recently, I've been captivated by the cows trying to be the next Happy California Cow.
No, really, it's real. There are quite a few nominees at the moment and I am having a devil of a time trying to decide who I like best. Let me tell you about them and you will see what I mean.
First, there's Jen. She is a calf with an overbearing mother(think kiddie beauty queen). I probably won't vote for her as I think her mother wants it more than Jen does.
Second, there's Shelby. She's British and comes to us through the fog. She even has a patch on her that looks like the queen of England. She's a possibility.
Kirsten comes to us freezing her udder off in Minnesota. She is also being stalked by a wolf. So far, she is the front runner. (I can't help it I have a tender heart)
Alicia is one of those bratty teenagers who says "you know" and "like" a lot. She has a brattier little brother that keeps interrupting her video.
Soo( I know ...I have to fight the urge to automatically pick her) is from Korea and even made up a little song. Her whole video is subtitled. She does manage to eek out a little English though.
I am still deciding between Kirsten and Soo. I wish I could vote for both of them. I'll probably pick Kirsten though. I would hate to contribute to her demise by that wolf! Plus buy(I mean vote) American, right?
You can vote too. Just go to www.realcaliforniamilk.com and watch the videos and then pick.
You can have a voice in who is the next Happy California Cow!! Woo-Hoo!!! or should I say Moo-moo??