Oh, To Be Thirteen

No, not thirteen years old. Nobody in their right mind would want to be that age. I,personally, was skinny with pimples, kind of greasy hair, and a "pixie" haircut. Never again!! Think about when you were thirteen years old...now don't you feel silly for thinking that was my theme today?
I am talking shoe size. My husband needs some new "tennis" shoes. I know there are hundreds of kinds out there walking, running, soccer, cross-trainers, to name just a few but let's just call them tennis shoes for now, all right? The mere number of tennis shoes is mind boggling enough but when you are a size 14 narrow, things change rapidly.
We were in a shoe store today. They had at least 250 different styles of shoes to choose from. They had 4 size 14's. Really! One of them was silver with a red swoosh. Well, my husband is rather conservative when it comes to footwear so they were O-U-T! The other three pairs were no good either.
Now if you wore a size thirteen there were about 100 choices. See what I mean?? Just one little shoe size makes all the difference and I know the culprit. It is the toe next to my husband's big toe. It probably has a name but I don't know it. It is about 1/2 to3/4 of an inch longer than the big toe. I guess it could be named Fourteen!
I have offered on occasion to lop off the ends of those Fourteens but so far he hasn't given me the green light. Oh, well.....it was just a suggestion.
Anyway, earlier in the day we did find a store that had three pairs of Size fourteens and he did buy a pair. They are really jazzy. They have a lot of silver(as in metallic) on them. They were a perfect fit so we did buy them but he wants to keep looking. I know he will wear them to the Y when we work out but I don't think he really wants to wear them around--you know like to the mall or out to dinner.
You wouldn't believe how gaudy these new -fangled tennis shoes look in a size fourteen. They're pretty bad. Think Circus clown on acid. Now, in a size thirteen.....not so much.
I know that my husband would really like to find a pair of all white plain tennis shoes. Not Keds but maybe Reeboks. Oh, if he was only a 13.......................where is my kitchen knife?


Just kidding!