SURPRISE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This has been a week of surprises. First of all, someone is marrying Rush Limbaugh. And to my surprise, three other women did it before her. What were these women thinking? Anyone that opinionated has to be hard to live with.

Another shocking surprise( sarcasm here) Miley Cyrus' boyfriend broke up with her and moved out of her house! First, how kind of him to move out and secondly, isn't she like 17?? Her parents let her have a man live with her?? What is wrong with these people-- I thought her dad was against achey-breaky hearts and if that wasn't the formula for heartbreak I don't know what is.

Reportedly, Tom Cruise didn't want to walk the red carpet with Joshua Jackson, Katie's old boyfriend. HA!! What a surprise(more sarcasm here) Tom Cruise is threatened by Pacey!!! OMG! I hope Tom doesn't find out Joshua's from a different dimension( FRINGE reference--watch the show it's really good). That would really freak him out. Oh, he even asked for beefed up security because of Jackson--more proof that he has Katie hypnotized.

You may remember Bjork, the singer who wore the swan dress --well, surprise(giant sarcasm here) she's done it again. No, she didn't break out the old swan dress instead she wore the dress in the picture up top. Lovely, isn't it? Kinda like she got wrapped in foil--at least, it's gold fold and not aluminum! Actually, it is just her style if you ask me and check out the hose--Her big toe is protruding. I guess she hasn't heard up there in Iceland that no hose is the way to go nowadays.

I'm sure more surprises await us. After all, I got my surprise yesterday--a pimple at age 60. Yes, I know--I'm neurotic as a pretzel. SURPRISE!!!