Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Is it Just Me?

The weirdest stuff happens to me. I don't invite it in. It just seems to find me no matter where I go or what I am doing. Yesterday was a perfect example of this phenomenon. I worked out after I volunteered at the Chamber of Commerce.
I had a great day there. It was busy and varied and it was fun. No weird phone calls like the last time. It was a day of great hope. I worked out well too. I did the stepper and the treadmill and the stationary bike. The whole time there was a man on the machine called the elliptical and he was going like a house afire. I wanted to say OHMYGOSH HOW DO YOU DO THAT??? to him but I wisely kept my mouth shut. He was there when I got there and when I left and he was still going at the same hectic pace. If he hadn't been in the gym you'd have thought he was running from the devil or something. He was that fast. Is it just me or what does that prove? I know we should be healthy and all that but his frantic workout seemed almost silly to me. Mostly, I admired his ability but part of me wanted to laugh until I fell on the floor. He really looked pretty funny, especially with the jaunty scarf tied around his forehead.
Anyway, he didn't look as sweaty as I did when I was done so I decided to go and freshen up in the ladies locker room. I was washing my face and I noticed a little old lady sitting on one of the benches. Now the pool is closed for repairs and she wasn't in the workout room so I'm not sure where she came from but she was only half dressed.
She told me I looked hot and I didn't tell her she forgot to put her pants on. Yes, folks, she was in her underpants!!! I said I was(averting my eyes as much as possible without being rude) and jokingly said, I just can't wait to go outside. I was kidding of course, it was 90 degrees in the shade yesterday. Oh! says she I hate this weather. I can't be out in the sun without getting faint. She had a very fair complexion and was old and weighed about 80 pounds(easier to assess since she was IN HER UNDERPANTS!) so I said well, you are very fair.
Oh no, says she, it's all because she went for a walk in Vegas. It's hot there(REALLY????) and she took a walk at 11 am and thought she would be fine but she fainted. And ever since then(never did establish when this actually was) she couldn't be out in the sun. SO what do you say to something like that? I said I know it is really hot there because my daughter lives there. Oh, she wanted to know, does she like it there? So I said yes, and continued to wash up and get a drink of water and then we bid each other good bye. She was still sitting there in her underpants! As far as I know, she is still sitting there.
This kind of stuff happens to me all the time. It must be something about me.

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