Thursday, April 24, 2008

Ebony and Ivory

Poor Barack Obama. He thinks that if he is elected he will be the first black President of the United States. Well, he is wrong. I know because I heard it on television. Bill Clinton was the first black President. SAY WHAT????
Bill said it himself. I heard him. Apparently he has never looked in the mirror or else he has the same plastic surgeon as Michael Jackson. Yes, Michael Jackson is the whitest black man in history.....except for Clinton.
I don't remember hearing this about Clinton while he was in office. Maybe he became black after he left office. That would explain why I never noticed. But I hate to break it to him. He wasn't the first black president either.
It was Abraham Lincoln!!! Its true. Just ask my kindergarten students. We had an old reproduction of Lincoln from an old Sunday magazine and it was dark. The kids were always convinced that Lincoln was black. I don't know if Lincoln ever took advantage of that or not. He did free the slaves after all. It made perfect sense to those five -year -olds.
So that got me Chelsea Clinton black then? I know Hillary is not. No way could she ever claim to be--she has that whiter than white skin like I have. Bet she burns every summer! But Chelsea does have that curly hair--not any more but when she was a kid, remember? Maybe Bill is telling the truth. So someday maybe Chelsea can run for president and she can claim to be the first black, woman candidate.
Frankly, I'd vote for her. Nobody can call me a racist either, Mr. Clinton!

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